31/12/2011

Last hours of the year 2011

I'm feeling quite good

I've got my family here

I've got my bf here with me since the morning

I've got my newborn nephew

Seems like I've got everything that I need, here with me :x

I just wanna keep this moment forever

Yep forever

This's the last new year's eve that I'm single

So cheer for me

I love u guys

Love. Lots of love

Hal

xoxo

Losing my interests

Currently I've lost interests in everything.

Yes I don't even know what I'm doing

I still wonder why ppl have to get married, then there'll be so many things must be done, need to be done but we don't really want to.

When ppl live to seek for some random happiness, it rarely comes. Only moments. Only moments. Happiness is like ice-cream. If you want it, you have to open the box, but then it will melt away

I've been tired lately.

Stuck with responsibilities and stuck with my heart. I'm in the middle. I'm damned if I do and I'm damned if I don't

I hate me being like this, when I can't even sure about myself

I'm just being overloaded a bit maybe

Hopefully

Peace

Hal

xoxo

Extremely... Nothing

Dạo này có nhiều việc xảy ra dồn dập quá, khiến mình cứ xoay xoay như chong chóng. Có cảm giác chưa kịp làm quen với việc này thì đã phải chuẩn bị cho việc khác.

Mình sợ sợ

Nhiều thứ tới cùng lúc thành ra mơ hồ hết, chẳng có cái gì rõ ràng cả.

Mình cứ như đang trôi bồng bềnh vậy

Vui. Có vui

Buồn. Có buồn

Nhiều lúc ngồi thừ ra, nhưng thật sự đầu óc lại rỗng tuếch

Đáng lẽ thời điểm này mình đang expect một cảm giác rất là extreme. Có thể là extremely happy hay là extremely sad hay là extremely worry gì đó... Nhưng lại chẳng có gì cả

...

Đời người sinh ra, lớn lên, học hành, sự nghiệp, gắn bó cuộc đời mình với một (hoặc vài) người khác, sinh con, nuôi dạy con cái, rồi già yếu ốm đau bệnh tật và chết đi.

Đúng là một cái vòng luẩn quẩn

Thật sự thì sống để tìm kiếm cái gì?

Merry Xmas

Merry Christmas everyone

This is the 1st Xmas that our family has welcome a new member Edward :x

So we just threw out a small party at home, coz my sis still can't move a lot.


But it was so much fun, and sometimes we have to stand up to look after Edward

Merry Xmas.

:)

Love

Hallie

P/S : I didn't have a wishlist today. Coz I think I've got enough now :)

My sister

My little sister just gave birth :D Thank God the baby and the mom was alright.

I was there with her since the morning. I was scared, I was nervous, I was confused. Becoz she was inside the room and I stayed outside alone. My family was pretty busy so they couldn't come in the morning.

She gave birth at 8:40pm. A boy. 3,3kg. Healthy. White like Edward :))

I'm feeling good and feeling so happy for her

And after all of this. I find out, it's not too difficult to do smt hard all alone.

But then why do I have to get married?

Friend

I had lots of fun tonight

Me and my friends we went to a bar, had some drinks then after that we walked together to end up the night with junk food.

I'm a kinda girl who can't live without Friend.

The wedding day is coming. So somehow I'm feeling like "not-enough-time-for-everything" all the time. I'm trying to catch every single moment before I get stuck seriously with someone.

I love my friends and I'm happy to know that they do love me too. And I'm lucky to have friends who really care about me.

Time time time please please please, don't fly

Love

Hal

P/S: I missed you today :)

Parents

Parents can bring you up and down

Yep

That's I wanna say

I know there're a lot a lot of differences between 2 generations. Parents they always want the best for their children. But sometimes they don't understand their "the best" is also different from "the best" of their children.

Even when you are 50, but you still live with your parents, that means they still wanna have their hands on your everything. And in parents' eyes, you're still a little kid who needs to be protected, and of course they think that they're always wiser than you.

Sometimes I do wanna move out, have my own life

Then I can have my OWN decisions in everything and I can be responsible for anything that I do

Ain't it better?

So hopefully after getting married, I will have what ppl call "A new life". With the man I love.

And I swear, I will raise my kid differently

Love mom and dad for having me on this earth. I love you. I always have and I always will

Hal

xoxo

Getting married.

So suddenly I'm gonna get married in April. Not September anymore

Suddenly. So I'm feeling so suddenly. Everything is so messy now tho actually we've finished lots of things

I'm feeling so weird. Like half of me can't wait for the big day. And there's still a half of me asking "What am I doing?"

I'm feeling so confused. I'm having doubts about everything, about everyone and about me as well

I really need someone to count on now. Someone I can talk to. Someone I can share my thoughts. Someone I can cry on the shoulder. Someone who won't say "Things are gonna be fine" :))

I dunno

I'm so half-of-something

What should I do? What should I feel?

Stay up lateee

Haiz I can't sleep, it's 2 in the morning now :( How come I get up early tmr huhu

I'm going to Singapore next month, for a week :-|

And maybe I'll get married earlier, maybe on April.

The house is about to be finished

And brr lots of stuff to think about, to care about

Maybe I've been thinking too much

...

:(

Love. Who?

I just realize sometimes in love, man can be so complicated and sensitive

Sometimes the one you love is not the one who loves you. But there's always someone for someone. If you're lucky enough, you'll find the right one. But if not, you have to learn the way to accept reality

I've a way of knowing that who loves me

But sometimes when something is said and done, there's no way back

There's really no way back dear :)

Life is not always fair.

If you missed a bus, there would be another one for you :)

My little heart

Feeling like this little heart of mine can't stand any pain anymore

So I'm trying all my best to save it, to protect it

No matter what I have to do

Even I have to learn the way to accept what I don't like

Or pretend that I don't see or don't hear or don't feel anything



~~
I just wanna feel safe

Pain. It teaches me.

Forget what hurt you, but never forget what it taught you.

Pain.

It helps me to grow up.

It teaches me to stay away from what could hurt me.

It teaches me to stop talking when I start to feel that I'm blowing up

It teaches me to know what could the result be so I could have my choice, to continue or to stop.

It teaches me to know that I shouldn't trust anyone 100%

It teaches me that your man is just human, so he does make mistakes like every other men do on this world everyday

It teaches me that people could be so cold, and could leave you behind without a doubt

It teaches me that there'll be nothing called "I love you most"

It teaches me that people could turn their back on you one day. Like throwing a piece of paper into the garbage. Quickly. Easily.

And it teaches me to know that how strong I could be



~~~~~

I realize that the pain was still here. Maybe it cut me so deep that time cannot heal my heart yet... Just a little touch of it, it reminds me of everything happened...

What if this wound never gets better?

Merde!

The only way to avoid being pissed off , is trying to stay away from things that might get you feel crazy.

I'm trying ok?

But sometimes I can't understand what you are really thinking

Maybe the pain made me change, I've become different now. I've become someone that I wish I'd never be

Damn!

Cleansing cream

Currently like this Korean song :D







~~~~

How does a man feel after breaking up?

Hurt? Pain? Same as woman?

Who knows

This diary

It feels really funny and a kinda hard to explain feeling everytime I look back this diary. I always want to know this day last year or 2 years ago, what was I doing and how was I feeling :D

I wanna keep this habit forever. Like a book of my soul, like an invisible friend, like a place I can be true to myself completely...

12 days until Xmas, this year feeling growing up too much :)) I don't really expect any presents from Santa anymore :) I've been good this year, I think I've been so patient this year and I've tried a lot :) So ain't it good? :p

Sooooo coldddddd today and I'm sooooo lazieeeeeeeeeeeeee now :P

Anyway, need to change and go out for gym

Love

Hal

xoxo

Lovely winter days

The weather is getting colder and colder everyday. I can see the sun but it still doesnt help me to feel warmer. But to me it's still perfect :X

As the doctor said, my sister is gonna give birth on 22nd this month. So around 10 days left, we're counting :X My big family just said hi to a new born girl of my cousin last few days. So this Tet holiday, the family will have 2 new kids :X Can't wait :X

Oh things are going so well for me :) My bf, he was like trying to be so gentle to me. No matter how angry or pissed off I am, he just said "Love you" . I was a little surprised I must say

Anyway, I hope this sunshine can last longer. Xmas is coming into town :X I wached a 3D cartoon movie called "Arthur Christmas" yesterday. It was pretty good. Funny how it is, deep down in my heart, sometimes I do still believe there's Santa, I've never met him but he must be somewhere :p

Love

Hal

xoxo

Who can?

I always tell the world that I'm strong enough to forgive and forget about things that hurt me.

But actually I can forgive, but I cannot forget

When something hurts me, it will leave a kinda scar in my heart, which will never be heal completely.

And sometimes when the feeling of that pain comes back, I always feel so scared.

I'm scared that I will remember it again

I'm scared that I will get hurt again bcoz of the same reasons

I'm scared that I will not know how to deal with the pain and how to comfort my heart

I'm scared to face the pain...

My heart, I'm not saying that it's full of scars. But there're a few that still hurt me so bad everytime unintentionally I think about it

Who can save me? Who can save my heart?

:)

7/12/11 - I felt happy today...please stay with me for a little longer...

Allergy

Besides pineapple, taro, idian taro, now I know that I'm allergic to Clindamycin as well :((

Clindamycin is a kinda antibiotic :(( my god

So from now on I must be very careful in using pills :((

Noodle party

Hôm qua cả nhà làm Noodle party, trong đấy các món ăn đều phải sử dụng nguyên liệu chính là Mỳ :D

Thành quả là cả nhà ăn ko hết :)) chỉ hết được 1 nửa số thức ăn, nhưng ai cũng ngon miệng và thấy là lạ :D


1. Súp nui - Gồm nấm rơm, nấm tươi, thịt băm nhỏ, trứng, viên mỳ vằn thắn...




2. Salad nui - Nui luộc chín xóc chút muối và dầu olive. Thêm cà chua dưa chuột thái nhỏ trộn lẫn với dầu dấm



3. Mỳ sốt bò bỏ lò - Mỳ sợi dài sốt bò bằm cà chua, phủ pho mát bên trên, bỏ lò nướng. Ngon đến mức papa thường ko thích phomat mà cũng ăn hết 1 đĩa to :))




4. Mỳ cuộn thịt bò - Mỳ sợi dài cuốn quanh miếng thịt bò nướng. Bên trên là nước sốt cà chua thịt xông khói



5. Bánh mỳ bơ tỏi - Mình rất có năng khiếu với món này :x :))





Thỉnh thoảng làm party như thế này rất vui íh :p

Cả nhà cùng nấu, rồi cùng nhau ăn :X

Vui

Peace

Hal

xoxo

Hello December

Hello December

Chả hiểu sao mặt mình lại bị dị ứng lại, lại phải bôi thuốc lem nhem như con mèo íh

Mà đúng là mình đang giống một con mèo phều phào vì bị viêm họng thì phải :(

Hôm nay dậy sớm từ 6:30am, định đi tập chăm chỉ thì trời bi giờ đang mưa to kinh đi được, đen xì xì nữa hx

Hôm qua thì lại phải lên nhà kia check một vài thứ để thợ người ta thi công nốt. Với cả gặp chú thiết kế nội thất. Hết tháng này là có nhà mới rồi nhé :D

Mấy hôm nay đang coi Pretty Little Liars, càng ngày càng lame vì mãi chưa hiểu A là thằng quái nào mà biết nhiều chuyện thế ko biết :))

Mình đang trên con đường hồi phục tim của mình. Nó bị xước xát đổ bể tùm lum. Gắn hoài mà vẫn có vết nứt. Làm thế nào? Liệu tình cảm chân thành tử tế có thể là keo 502 được ko? :(

Đôi lúc mình vẫn cảm thấy sợ, cảm thấy đau, cảm thấy buồn, cảm thấy giận :-s

Love

Hal

December ơi, tháng này sẽ có nhiều tin vui nhé :X